I don't know if this is a fair contest- as I truly believe that the reason why some women become mothers is because they instinctually know how to raise a child. As a professional who works with hundreds of families each year - it is a title that is given very carefully.
After years of research and observation, here are a few traits of women that I would consider "Mom of the Year":
1. UNSELFISH
In the case of my own mother and other mothers that I have worked with, "Mom of the Year" candidates are typically - unselfish. I have known many that personally take on part-time jobs or cut a splurge in their own budget to make room for something that their child really needs. Whenever I pass by a local music shop or school, I will see a "MOTY" take a quick nap because they want to make sure that they are there for their child when they are done with their lesson or activity. They are respectful of their child's time, and the time of whoever it is that is their caretaker at that particular moment.
2. WORK-LIFE BALANCE
There are some women who want to work - there are some women who need to work. A "Mom of the Year" is one that knows that at the beginning, the middle, and the end of the day - Family Comes First.
In the wise words of my late father, "Family first - that means...you are second." It may be hard to think that saying "no" to an additional project, hour of work, or professional obligation will have a dramatic impact on your mother-child relationship, but if you look at children who are at the park with their parents (sans cell phone), you will see something totally transformational in their child's eyes.
Most young children do not know what you do - they know who you are to them and it is summed up in three letters: "MOM" (or in the case of an emergency... "MOMMY").
3. GREAT MANAGER
When life hands you a speed bump, you do not quickly drive over it in hopes that it does not ruin your transmission. "MOTY" will know how to handle the problem by using a simple three step process:
1. Evaluate the Problem
2. Find a Solution
3. Implement a Solution
When a "MOTY" sees that there is an issue that needs to be addressed in their child's life. they do not vacillate for weeks on what the solution could be. They use highly effective problem solving skills - and work towards resolution before the end of the day.
4. HEAD COACH (and ASSISTANT HEAD COACH)
Here is what may be the hardest task of any parent: being objective in a totally subjective role. As a parent, you are not there to dictate to your child in what they need to do, be, accomplish, understand, learn, uphold - before they reach 18 years old or when they leave the house (for good) whichever comes first. Your role is to raise them and care for them. Sometimes it means giving them praise when they need it - and redirecting behavior when they don't (need praise that is).
As an observer of different parenting styles - I have seen the MOTY navigate through these two roles seamlessly. Sometimes they are more of the parent "strategist" by having the child look at the big picture, and sometimes they are "tactical" by instructing the child on how to execute a certain task.
Here is an example: When I was younger, my mother (and father) would encourage us to not pay too much attention to what people now and days call "bullies". It was a commonality that people would be bullied in life and they instilled into us that as long as you know who you are and what you are, nothing can hurt you (that was the strategist in my "MOTY" and "FOTY"). When an actual bully was bothering someone in my family - they would encourage a more tactical approach by showing us the power of kindness and then later on, assertiveness.
We never had issues with bullies because this was one of the major strengths in my "MOTY".
5. WARMTH
As much as I praise my mother for her valiant parenting styles, I also must give credit to my mother-in-law (a European clinical psychologist) who has given me an insight on the power of warmth for a "MOTY".
She gave me the example of when a child is ready to come home from school and what they remember when they come home. She said that when her two boys arrived home, they were greeted with the same three things every weekday:
1. A kiss/hug
2. Something good to eat
3. A "no-pressure" activity/conversation
She asked me what I thought about that statement and as I was thinking about the times that I had come home from school, the warmth that I received from my family - the great food that my mom always made, and the peace/quiet that I was given as part of my "decompression hour".
I really did appreciate the times where I would see my mother and/or father waiting for me at the kitchen table with a huge smile on their face. I know that children bring a great deal of happiness to their parents, but the strength and dedication that a parent brings to a child - really does last a lifetime.
The views and opinions of this blog article are my own. Thank you so much to my wonderful mother, mother-in-law, family members, and "MOTY" clients that I dedicate this article to. It is your hard work and commitment to raising fine young children that will make this world a better place, for generations to come!
After years of research and observation, here are a few traits of women that I would consider "Mom of the Year":
1. UNSELFISH
In the case of my own mother and other mothers that I have worked with, "Mom of the Year" candidates are typically - unselfish. I have known many that personally take on part-time jobs or cut a splurge in their own budget to make room for something that their child really needs. Whenever I pass by a local music shop or school, I will see a "MOTY" take a quick nap because they want to make sure that they are there for their child when they are done with their lesson or activity. They are respectful of their child's time, and the time of whoever it is that is their caretaker at that particular moment.
2. WORK-LIFE BALANCE
There are some women who want to work - there are some women who need to work. A "Mom of the Year" is one that knows that at the beginning, the middle, and the end of the day - Family Comes First.
In the wise words of my late father, "Family first - that means...you are second." It may be hard to think that saying "no" to an additional project, hour of work, or professional obligation will have a dramatic impact on your mother-child relationship, but if you look at children who are at the park with their parents (sans cell phone), you will see something totally transformational in their child's eyes.
Most young children do not know what you do - they know who you are to them and it is summed up in three letters: "MOM" (or in the case of an emergency... "MOMMY").
3. GREAT MANAGER
When life hands you a speed bump, you do not quickly drive over it in hopes that it does not ruin your transmission. "MOTY" will know how to handle the problem by using a simple three step process:
1. Evaluate the Problem
2. Find a Solution
3. Implement a Solution
When a "MOTY" sees that there is an issue that needs to be addressed in their child's life. they do not vacillate for weeks on what the solution could be. They use highly effective problem solving skills - and work towards resolution before the end of the day.
4. HEAD COACH (and ASSISTANT HEAD COACH)
Here is what may be the hardest task of any parent: being objective in a totally subjective role. As a parent, you are not there to dictate to your child in what they need to do, be, accomplish, understand, learn, uphold - before they reach 18 years old or when they leave the house (for good) whichever comes first. Your role is to raise them and care for them. Sometimes it means giving them praise when they need it - and redirecting behavior when they don't (need praise that is).
As an observer of different parenting styles - I have seen the MOTY navigate through these two roles seamlessly. Sometimes they are more of the parent "strategist" by having the child look at the big picture, and sometimes they are "tactical" by instructing the child on how to execute a certain task.
Here is an example: When I was younger, my mother (and father) would encourage us to not pay too much attention to what people now and days call "bullies". It was a commonality that people would be bullied in life and they instilled into us that as long as you know who you are and what you are, nothing can hurt you (that was the strategist in my "MOTY" and "FOTY"). When an actual bully was bothering someone in my family - they would encourage a more tactical approach by showing us the power of kindness and then later on, assertiveness.
We never had issues with bullies because this was one of the major strengths in my "MOTY".
5. WARMTH
As much as I praise my mother for her valiant parenting styles, I also must give credit to my mother-in-law (a European clinical psychologist) who has given me an insight on the power of warmth for a "MOTY".
She gave me the example of when a child is ready to come home from school and what they remember when they come home. She said that when her two boys arrived home, they were greeted with the same three things every weekday:
1. A kiss/hug
2. Something good to eat
3. A "no-pressure" activity/conversation
She asked me what I thought about that statement and as I was thinking about the times that I had come home from school, the warmth that I received from my family - the great food that my mom always made, and the peace/quiet that I was given as part of my "decompression hour".
I really did appreciate the times where I would see my mother and/or father waiting for me at the kitchen table with a huge smile on their face. I know that children bring a great deal of happiness to their parents, but the strength and dedication that a parent brings to a child - really does last a lifetime.
The views and opinions of this blog article are my own. Thank you so much to my wonderful mother, mother-in-law, family members, and "MOTY" clients that I dedicate this article to. It is your hard work and commitment to raising fine young children that will make this world a better place, for generations to come!
