When parents call me, it is at varying stages in the educational timeline. Sometimes they call me when they think something is wrong, sometimes they call me when they have confirmed that something has gone wrong, sometimes - they call me, when it is almost too late.
I've realized that through the years parents are becoming increasingly more obsessed with the idea of having a label attached to their child. As an adult, there were many labels that were associated with my social standing and motivation profile. Teachers always called me, "Gifted, High Achiever, Motivated, Type-A, Workaholic, Task Oriented..." while in class or after turning in big projects. When I look back to those early years, I would have given anything to be characterized as an individual who was, "Creative, Intuitive, Inspirational..."however, like with many things, I assume that is what adulthood is for (making up for time lost in your childhood..)
Nowadays, when parents sense that something is wrong, they believe that they need to attach a label to a child. For example, students that constantly need to move around are labeled as "ADHD" or a student who cannot maintain eye contact for longer than 1.1 seconds has "Autism" or "Aspergers Syndrome". If this were indeed the case, each student in the classroom would have some form of Neurological Disorder either in Physical Education class or while taking the SAT.
I believe that labels, at times, are not only dangerous in describing your child, but can also be stigmatizing. I was involved in a situation at school where a school reviewed at a report that was provided by one of my clients who has a 2nd grader in need of services. The report, which was conducted by a developmental pediatrician in the area, labeled the child as having Autism. The school wanted to have the child receive services under the umbrella of Autism and would not relent at the notion that the student was Autistic. It took several hours and pages of discussion before the school team finally agreed to not have that label listed in the students profile.
It disheartens me to see that some individuals carelessly (and callously) describe children with these conditions. It is a little unsettling that we are more focused on the label - than the actual challenges that need to be overcome, which are presented with the behaviors. Although undiagnosed, there are many individuals I know of who have some form of ADHD (myself included). It is through understanding who you are and what you may need help in doing that makes you the individual that you are. Oftentimes I look at the challenges that a child has - and all I see is a child, that has the same desire to be like every other child they come across. To have the feeling that they have made their parents proud and at the end of the day, feel really great about something that they have accomplished. They don't rest their head and night thinking, "I have XYZ". They say to themselves, "I love you mom and dad - and thank you for accepting me for who I am."
What I help parents with - is getting their kids to be at state of gratitude, sooner, rather than later.
I've realized that through the years parents are becoming increasingly more obsessed with the idea of having a label attached to their child. As an adult, there were many labels that were associated with my social standing and motivation profile. Teachers always called me, "Gifted, High Achiever, Motivated, Type-A, Workaholic, Task Oriented..." while in class or after turning in big projects. When I look back to those early years, I would have given anything to be characterized as an individual who was, "Creative, Intuitive, Inspirational..."however, like with many things, I assume that is what adulthood is for (making up for time lost in your childhood..)
Nowadays, when parents sense that something is wrong, they believe that they need to attach a label to a child. For example, students that constantly need to move around are labeled as "ADHD" or a student who cannot maintain eye contact for longer than 1.1 seconds has "Autism" or "Aspergers Syndrome". If this were indeed the case, each student in the classroom would have some form of Neurological Disorder either in Physical Education class or while taking the SAT.
I believe that labels, at times, are not only dangerous in describing your child, but can also be stigmatizing. I was involved in a situation at school where a school reviewed at a report that was provided by one of my clients who has a 2nd grader in need of services. The report, which was conducted by a developmental pediatrician in the area, labeled the child as having Autism. The school wanted to have the child receive services under the umbrella of Autism and would not relent at the notion that the student was Autistic. It took several hours and pages of discussion before the school team finally agreed to not have that label listed in the students profile.
It disheartens me to see that some individuals carelessly (and callously) describe children with these conditions. It is a little unsettling that we are more focused on the label - than the actual challenges that need to be overcome, which are presented with the behaviors. Although undiagnosed, there are many individuals I know of who have some form of ADHD (myself included). It is through understanding who you are and what you may need help in doing that makes you the individual that you are. Oftentimes I look at the challenges that a child has - and all I see is a child, that has the same desire to be like every other child they come across. To have the feeling that they have made their parents proud and at the end of the day, feel really great about something that they have accomplished. They don't rest their head and night thinking, "I have XYZ". They say to themselves, "I love you mom and dad - and thank you for accepting me for who I am."
What I help parents with - is getting their kids to be at state of gratitude, sooner, rather than later.
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